14 LESSONS FROM 14 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

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No one has the blueprint for marriage. 

What works for couple A may be the breaking point for couple B.

Marriage is a blessing and I can't say I have a perfect marriage  but I think God helped me in hacking the basics of peaceful living. 

We are not doing marriage the perfect way but committed to making it work. Thriving and not just surviving. 

Today the 18th October is the 14th year of being a partner to this amazing human. You know that saying that God knew us even before we were formed. He put in my life the perfect support system. My husband, my family and my friends....amazing souls.


1. Allow your partner be who they want to be. Allow your partner have their own hobby. Let your spouse breathe , life should not revolve around breathing same air with you. I am grateful for  the man who will drop me at my friends parties and the days he doesn't he reminds me not to drink too much so I can drive home safely.

2. Never stop being each other's cheerleaders. Every move I have made in my career is because he is there telling me I can DO it. There are days he makes me feel like I am actually more intelligent than I am.

3. There will be the bad days, it may stretch to weeks and even to years . Never stop believing in yourselves. There will be days of enough, nothing and days of surplus. Do not allow the seasons to tamper with your feelings (easy to say right, I know)

4. Sacrifice: I can not stress this enough. I drag my husband to the cinemas to watch Nigerian movies. Half the time he is dead bored but because he knows those movies make me happy he goes along. For his own sanity he watches the movies he likes on his own. Win, win. 

5. Be YOU.

6. Be unapologetically YOU.

7. Do not compare. Comparison is the thief of JOY. 

8. Arguments does not mean your marriage is doomed. Communication and empathy are very crucial. When we were young, we fantasized about how marriage will be a never ending fun, parties and sex with our partners. Life as a couple is fun but difficult nonetheless. 

9. If you truly want to love...learn how to forgive. 

10. Patience.....truly a virtue. There will be days you want to throw things at your partners head. Resist the urge to let the devil use you.

11. Everything will not always make sense. You are both going to take and make decisions that may or may not work out as planned. There is something called not crying over split milk. Re-strategise.

12. Do not lose yourself in the pursuit of a happy life.

13. Do not forget to have a support system outside your partner. There are times you need to breathe and exhale. Go out, have fun with other people. Laugh. Those moments are very precious.

14. Ha, well this is year 14. I will be back next year to give an update.


Happy anniversary to the bae. I will not trade the support you constantly give me. 

Thank you for the times you remind me that giving up on anything is never an option. 

Thank you for never doubting me. 

I will write again. 

Comments

  1. AnonymousMonday, October 18, 2021

    You are the most mature, intelligent , caring. Loving soul ever . Loving you gets easier each day .
    You have a heart of Gold and truly fears and love God. Your ability to sacrifice and support should be studied in Harvard . Remain blessed my love . Cheers to many more years . Oh and yes I remain Anonymous

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TemmytayoMonday, October 18, 2021

      Thanks husband!!!!!
      My greatest cheerleader.

      Delete
  2. OluwafemiyeyeMonday, October 18, 2021

    Happy Anniversary again!
    Here's to many more years of fruitfulness in Jesus name.
    Not that kind if fruitful sha, dollars.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TemmytayoMonday, October 18, 2021

      I agree. Fruitful in forex. That is the game. Thank you dear sister.

      Delete
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