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Showing posts from December, 2019

The One About Hemorrhoids

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 Let me start by saying something important: nobody warns you about adulthood properly. It Started Innocently. Everything was normal. I woke up, drank my tea, minded my business like a responsible citizen. Around midday, I felt pressed and off to the loo I went to do a number two. Five minutes after, my life changed. Chaos. The Moment of Realization Let me tell you something: when hemorrhoids arrive, they do not knock politely . They enter like an uninvited relative during Christmas. Suddenly sitting down is no longer an activity. It becomes a negotiation with destiny . I sat down. My body said: “Excuse me, who authorized this?” I stood up. My body said: “Where do you think you're going? ” At that point I realized this pain is not joking with me. The Walk of Suffering Let me talk about walking. Normally, walking is simple. Left leg and right leg abi? But when hemorrhoids flare up, you start walking like someone that is transporting fragile eggs between your bu...
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2019....THE END OF A DECADE

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And in a few hours 2019 will roll by, the end of a decade. Quite a number of people have argued this ''end of a decade" thing but see no one really cares. We are moving into the year 2020 !!! This outgoing decade has been very eventful for me. So many coulda, woulda, shoulda's but hey life doesn't stop for anyone. I  had a lot of plans: 1. To get another degree (Achieved) 2. To go back to size 8 (if wishes were horses, still a size 12) 3. To stop taking fizzy drinks. (There is a bottle of Teem right in front of me as I type this) 4. To be more adventurous with food.( For where, same ol' stuff) 5. To go out more (On this one, I tried) 6. To be very deliberate about my happiness. (I tried) 7. To revive my blog (if you ever get to see this post then I did) 8. To trust God even when everything looks bleak ( I am work in progress) 9. To travel more ( Between Buhari and Osinbajo I don't know who to blame) 10. To migrate ( I am still here sha...v...
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In Pursuit Of Size 10...

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I have always been that skinny girl. Flat chest but a gift load of the derriere. So basically i have been that skinny girl with the bum all my life. Fast forward to 2007 when I met my husband, I was still a comfortable size 6 and inching towards a size 8. Then the problem of choosing my wedding dress came up and getting an actual size 6 became a problem.  I started eating like a termite, just so I could fill up and fit into my desired wedding dress. I became very friendly with the guys at the local Chinese on Elephant and Castle. Will stop by like 3 times a week and stuff my face with noodles and chicken. Got the result. Size 8. I maintained the size 8 religiously until 2015 when I just let go and ballooned into a size 10/12. Ha, I could not button my shirts. My pants now became size 14 because 'bum'. I hated the round stomach and the big fat bum,unnecessary attention and then clothes don't fit. Double problem for a fine girl. 2018 September, I started taking ...
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Awesome God...Birthday Post.

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So, today I turned 41 . I mean a whole 40 plus another year o. Isn't God good? I was never a big fan of birthdays till the year I turned 30. 11 years after and i am still as pumped. Many times, I look back on how God has been good to me and how he has blessed me and I know a thousand tongues will never be enough to appreciate Him. Thankful for another year. The plan is to take myself out and eat ALONE, bask in the awesomeness of my person but guess who is at home running from the living room to the loo every 30 minutes. I fried eggs this morning and put in too much pepper..... Still, Happy Birthday to the angel called Shades.
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