The Pursuit of "Happy"
I get a lot of
''I look forward to your whatsapp status"
"Your Status updates makes me laugh" "
"Are you ever unhappy?''
" I love how you celebrate your friends on their birthdays"
" Do you ever feel sad?"
Oh by all means I have my own issues, there are nights I cried myself to sleep meanwhile I'd be getting messages of your status is cracking me up big time. There are days I am very moody and sad but people will laugh because "she is funny". There are days I wonder If God has forgotten about my petitions and forsaken me.
I am "lucky" (as people have told me) to be married to a man who does not stifle my personality, who encourages me to be myself. A man that does everything to make me smile. The one who reminds me to update my blog and even helps to proof read when he is able to.
When the storms of life gets high....I choose happy. Happiness is not easy, but happiness is an inside job. I choose to see the good in people always. I have learnt to be intentional with my choices, intentional with the people in my tribe, intentional the way I love my God.
The pursuit of happiness is a never ending cycle. I have found out in the last forty something years of my existence that NO SINGLE thing gives perfect happiness or joy. Happiness does not come from getting things we don't have, but mostly from the things we already have .
IF you hinge your happiness on promotion at work, getting married, having kids, being successful in your business etc and those things don't work out? What then happens?
Have you not seen people marry and die without ever having children? Have you not heard about people being passed on their rightful/ deserved promotion at work?
Have you not heard of or seen people invest money and time in a business that doesn't break even or get to see the light of the day? So many what ifs are on the road to the pursuit of happiness.
When people ask me why I celebrate my friends/tribe so much...my answer always: tell people you love them when they can hear it. Celebrate people when they can still read or see or hear what you say about them.
I tell my friends when I miss them, I tell them I LOVE YOU. Male/female. Because for all I know tomorrow may never come.
I know it is not easy, but learn to LOVE yourself, know and accept that you cannot be everything to everyone. You will burn out. Be kind to people, choose to see the good in others and you will learn to love unconditionally.
It’s only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth – and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, we will then begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had. – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
''I look forward to your whatsapp status"
"Your Status updates makes me laugh" "
"Are you ever unhappy?''
" I love how you celebrate your friends on their birthdays"
" Do you ever feel sad?"
Oh by all means I have my own issues, there are nights I cried myself to sleep meanwhile I'd be getting messages of your status is cracking me up big time. There are days I am very moody and sad but people will laugh because "she is funny". There are days I wonder If God has forgotten about my petitions and forsaken me.
I am "lucky" (as people have told me) to be married to a man who does not stifle my personality, who encourages me to be myself. A man that does everything to make me smile. The one who reminds me to update my blog and even helps to proof read when he is able to.
When the storms of life gets high....I choose happy. Happiness is not easy, but happiness is an inside job. I choose to see the good in people always. I have learnt to be intentional with my choices, intentional with the people in my tribe, intentional the way I love my God.
The pursuit of happiness is a never ending cycle. I have found out in the last forty something years of my existence that NO SINGLE thing gives perfect happiness or joy. Happiness does not come from getting things we don't have, but mostly from the things we already have .
IF you hinge your happiness on promotion at work, getting married, having kids, being successful in your business etc and those things don't work out? What then happens?
Have you not seen people marry and die without ever having children? Have you not heard about people being passed on their rightful/ deserved promotion at work?
Have you not heard of or seen people invest money and time in a business that doesn't break even or get to see the light of the day? So many what ifs are on the road to the pursuit of happiness.
When people ask me why I celebrate my friends/tribe so much...my answer always: tell people you love them when they can hear it. Celebrate people when they can still read or see or hear what you say about them.
I tell my friends when I miss them, I tell them I LOVE YOU. Male/female. Because for all I know tomorrow may never come.
I know it is not easy, but learn to LOVE yourself, know and accept that you cannot be everything to everyone. You will burn out. Be kind to people, choose to see the good in others and you will learn to love unconditionally.
It’s only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth – and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, we will then begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had. – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Inspirational!
ReplyDeleteAbsolute truth.
ReplyDeleteThanks for seeing my point of view.
DeleteHuman, we all are.
ReplyDeleteSo true...so true.
Delete"Happiness is by choice", we were taught. I daresay it's a tough choice.
ReplyDeleteHowever tough, it is always better than its alternative on both short and long term.
A very tough choice. But happiness remains an inside job. Thank you Ire for stopping by.
DeleteKUDOS . great read. bUT WALAI 9ja makes it very DI PI CUT**** to stay happy
ReplyDeleteI am actually upset that i know who left this comment...you people play too much....LOL
DeleteWord
ReplyDeleteThanks Akinleke mi. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteSpot on...
ReplyDeletePlus we rise by lifting others. Keep on being you and the sky will be the starting point.
Thank you Seun...Thank You.
DeleteLovely lovely... lol! Happiness is indeed a choice. Making that choice starts from understanding that the power to be happy lies in our hands and not anyone else or not any situation. Once this has been established, na to start to do the inside work (like you already said).
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Love yourself and every other thing will follow.
DeleteIf we keep waiting for the ‘next best thing’, we will never truly experience happiness. No one has a perfect life. Eventually, the ‘the next best thing’ will come, we will get used to it and then start desiring something new all over again. It is an unending cycle.
ReplyDeleteThe deal is to pay attention to your energy, leave draining conversations and situations; connect with your tribe and find your vibe. Live in the present moment because we cannot change the past and we don’t know the future. It may sound easier said than done but it is doable.
Oh wow, thank you for this. Thank you. There may not be the next best thing tho...as we grow our desires and yearnings grow and change.
DeleteRide on girl!
ReplyDeleteThank You.
DeleteHappiness is like a middle name on your birth certificate you sometimes forget it's there, but guess what its yours and always will be. The choice to use it lies with you.
ReplyDeleteI agree. The choice has always been with us. We need to use it more often.
DeleteThis is so insightful. May God continue to help us
ReplyDeleteAmen. He will continue to help us. We really can't do this on our own.
DeleteAs great as all this is. I dare to say... self happiness can only take you so far.... especially when the people around you have issues. Not saying take panadol for another's headache... but happiness is more wholesome and lived fully when we uplift those around us too.
ReplyDeleteThis is why we need to look for the good in others. Help others around us but not at the detriment of our own peace. It is hard work but do able. Thanks Lagos Wifey.
DeleteNice one,Shade.....deep and reflective.....💯
ReplyDeleteThank You Yeesh.
DeleteGood read and should I say, weldone? The fact is being happy is a choice, even when the odds are against being happy, like it's always the case in 9ja, the choice still remains yours! There is always a reason not to be happy and allow oneself to indulge in self pity! In the end, the conscious effort to be happy is key and it's the key to long healthy living...keep smiling and be happy! You only got yourself to blame 😀😋
ReplyDeleteThank You!! Oh yeah, you should say weldone na*chuckles* . I agree with you.
DeleteNigeria can give you a million and one reason to be moody. We have to consciously keep at it.